was clinging on to the last straw… drowning now… the house is shut and still.. the wind blows, bleak and shrill… no thats just a bit of nonsense.. shows how my mind is working.. well whatever hope i had has vanished today..the feeling of weakness, helplessness and aimlessness has overcome me completely… there is no desire to move ahead.. nothing that holds meaning is expected tomorrow… and at this point i discover my hidden talent.. i can act… i can act… i refuse to let my deepest fears to show on my face… becomes easier when someone has alreadys heard your fears/sorrows… then you just put on a plastic smile and move along… not that i havent done it in the past.. only i had hopes that this artificiality would be replaced someday by spontaniety… but now there is no such hope.. the last straw is gone.. the plastic smile in place… yeah.. life goes on…
Similar Posts
to be or not to be… is there really a choice?
lately i have come to realise something that i knew all my life… i have been born with a silver spoon in my mouth… having said that.. let me elaborate upon why the title sounds so morose… you see, i have also realised that the world sees me like that… born with a silver spoon……
do you have any questions?
i, like many my age, have several issues with the well accepted traditional arranged marriage system so integral a part of “our indian culture”. a lot of my friends, particularly men, have asked me often, “do you believe in arranged marriages?” i always asked, what’s there to believe? the system’s right here in front of…
#2 No Holiday for Teachers
I am again writing on a holiday. It is a bit disappointing that we continue to work on holidays, and yet, it seems so natural. My attempts at keeping work and personal life separate have gone for a toss. A few years ago I made a strong decision to not make work calls to people…
What If We Let Students Fail, Reflect, and Change Course
I was a fairly underconfident teen in 1994. As the new academic session began, our class was asked to move to the ‘big’ building in school that housed the senior secondary classes. I wasn’t excited but I had recently started loving some subjects. English and science in particular. In class nine, in a substitution period,…
chaos rules my life…
writing this for two reasons… one is coz a friend asked “where is the post that is titled chaos rules my life”… the other is that today i realised the full impetus of the chaos in my life… i wouldnt say that things have become chaotic now and werent so earlier… something or the other…
hugs…
i have been told i am not a very physically expressive person… except maybe with my niece… i dont like to sit too close to people.. even if i have known them all my life… i am not the hand holding kinds… when girls around me cry, i have often been told by those around…